The Space Museum

The Space Museum

I love the Space Museum, and I'm not ashamed to say so. And I mean the whole story, not just the first episode! The beginning itself is great, too. "We've got our clothes on!" exclaims Ian as they find they've suddenly changed from their Crusader clothes to normal clothes. "I should hope so!" the Doctor replies, before adding that it would save them the bother of changing. I love how the Doctor thinks it's a bother to change clothes! Subtly setting up the JNT era costumes, maybe? This is clearly a forward-thinking story, as not only does it set up the 80s, it also sets up Moffat's era! Vicki gets a glass of water, and then looks at something off-screen which causes her to drop the glass. She saw one of the Silence! The scene works perfectly if you watch it like that, and it's a much better reason for her to drop the glass than "the plot needs her to".

I should point out that (for a change) I love Vicki's outfit here. Particularly her socks. Anyway, you can tell this is Mervyn Pinfield directing, as we get a loud jang of music as Ian says "why aren't we leaving any footprints?" Then we get another one later as Vicki's arm goes right through the, erm, thing in the museum she's looking at. Which brings me to another point. If they aren't really there, and can walk through walls and so on, why is the floor solid? Why don't they just drop through the ground? I know, I know, you wouldn't have a story. There are many Star Trek episodes where I've asked that question, too. Oh yes, and another problem. Why do the TARDIS crew rush out of sight when they see people, and why does Vicki try desperately not to sneeze? They have no idea at this point that the Moroks are hostile! Why not try and say hello? They've never rushed off to hide before they've met anybody ever before. It's peculiar.

I like Hartnell's "fluorescent substance" fluff. He's determined to get it out! He gets there eventually. The bit where they meet the Dalek is good, too, and where Vicki calls it friendly. She says they've learnt about Daleks in history books, but strangely their books only describe the Daleks, and don't use pictures. I refuse to believe that not one photograph of the Daleks survived their invasion! That's just not possible. Ian's response to her friendly comment is, "you wouldn't say that if we ever meet them again". Very subtle foreshadowing there...

I love this story. I know it seems as if I've just been complaining about it, but they're trifles. The story itself is enormous fun. It's mysterious and plays about with time in a way we haven't really seen before. Although it's stock music, the bit at the end as they "arrive" is terrific, it really sets the mood very well. I can't quite justify giving this full marks, but I love it dearly nonetheless. 9/10.

Dimensions of Time

Now, this is, according to everyone and their dogs, where the story falls apart. I beg to differ. It's hilarious, for one thing. The exposition spouted by Lobos near the beginning of this episode is priceless. It's not usually something I notice or care about, but it's so blatant here. I like Richard Shaw's performance, too. He plays Lobos as rather bored and uninterested, which he should be.

I don't want to criticise Dennis Spooner, since he's terrific as both a script writer and story editor, but I assume he's reponsible for the business with Ian's button at the start of this episode. Ian has lost a button, which the Doctor finds very interesting, claiming the least important things often lead to the greatest discoveries. Here though, it doesn't, as the button is never mentioned again! I assume it was there for some point. Maybe it wasn't, and it was just Glyn Jones making the valuable point that though small and seemingly unimportant things can lead to the greatest discoveries, they often don't.

The Xerons are a dull bunch, I do admit that. They're very strange too. "We'll kidnap the old man or the girl, explain our situation and they can then introduce us to the others". Yes, that's absolutely foolproof as a plan! The dramatic music as the Doctor is kidnapped is awful, made even worse by the fact that we know the Doctor isn't in danger, since we know already that the Xerons are harmless. I love how the Doctor pretends to faint, and they fall for it! Then he hides in a Dalek and, in a Dalek voice, says, "I fought them off, I am the master!" It's fantastic, and then he walks right into a couple of guards. Hartnell's having a great time in this episode. He gets kidnapped, pretends to faint, knocks somebody out, hides in a Dalek, gets captured again and has a very enjoyable interrogation scene with Lobos all in 25 minutes! And people call this dull? The interrogation scene is excellent fun. The Doctor's chuckling as he outwits Lobos is lovely. It's a shame Hartnell's going on holiday. Once again, I think the story won't be able to cope without him. I love how he suggests Lobos should lower the price of admission.

As soon as the Doctor is catpured, Ian becomes really bitchy to Barbara and Vicki as they try and get out of the museum. He keeps on shouting and losing his temper at everything. Eventually he calms down. Then he exclaims, "the minotaur!" and rushes at Barbara, pulling her top off! We'll have none of that, Ian! Their despair as they fail to find a way out of the museum is very well played, though, and right near the end of the episode, they find the TARDIS! How very exciting.

This is great. I really don't get its poor reputation. Lobos makes for an interesting villain. The exposition very nicely tells us why the Moroks are a bit crap (they're bored). The Xerons are a pretty wet bunch, but that pays off quite well later as Vicki leads the revolution, so I don't mind. The scenes with the Doctor are funny, the scenes with Vicki, Ian and Barbara are fairly tense and desperate as they lose the Doctor and struggle to find a way out. It's brilliant. 8/10.

The Search

The Morok Commander (who doesn't get to have a name) gets some nice exposition at the beginning of this episode, whinging about how he always gets blamed for everything. I say nice because it really echoes the whinging by Lobos in the previous episode. Maybe all Moroks tend to talk in exposition? They also use bizarre sentence construction, as he says to a guard, "why was not the cutting equipment brought to me?" I guess that happens to people who don't get to have names, they can't even speak properly. I like how he tells Lobos that our heroes could be in any of a thousand places, and Lobos says he expects a thousand places to be searched, while all the time the people they're after are eavesdropping on them.

The Morok who captures Ian, Barbara and Vicki is rather dim, isn't he? He just stands there while they huddle and have a long conversation. It's directed in a way that you could almost forget he's there, as he's off camera and Ian is happily chatting about escape plans. The Morok finally tells them to shut up after giving them about half an hour to discuss matters and decide on a plan. It's all rather amusing, really. Ian's fight with two Moroks is rather amusing, too, and there's also quite a sweet moment as he is reunited with Delos from the Romans, who is now in the guise of a Morok technician called, er, Morok technician. Why is Lobos the only Morok with a bloody name? And why is Morok technician called that anyway? There is no reference anywhere in the story to him being a technician, beyond him being called that in the credits! It's Lobos who does all the technology stuff in episode four to revive the Doctor, after all. Nothing makes sense in this story.

At least the Xerons have names, even if they are a pathetic bunch. Vicki's pretty disgusted with them. They babble about how good they are at planning. She wants to lead a revolution! What a moment for Vicki, she does actually start a planet-wide revolution. I'm not convinced by her saying that she wants the revolution because, "I have as many reasons as you, perhaps more". More? For her, her own life and the life of her three friends are at stake. For the Xerons their entire planet and civilisation is at stake! Somehow I think they have the greater claim there, Vicki.

This is a fairly uneventful episode, but it does hold up very well in Hartnell's absence, which is a very rare thing. Vicki starts a revolution, Barbara is gassed and Ian is captured, then escapes and manages to hold up Lobos with a gun. Ian says it might be enjoyable to kill Lobos! Blimey, Ian! Stripping Barbara, wanting to kill people. What's got into you? Anyway, not so much happens, but it's a very enjoyable not so much. 7.5/10.

The Final Phase

Lobos changes his mind about the Doctor's condition very quickly. One minute, "he's as good as dead," and the next he's saying that there's a only a chance the Doctor may not recover. Perhaps he was lying? The Doctor apparently gets rheumatism in cold temperatures. Clearly that doesn't stay with Time Lords for every regeneration. The Doctor states that, "my brain was working at the speed of a mechanical computer". Wow, that fast, eh? These Time Lords. Whatever will they dazzle us with next?

The Doctor has an "I'm the man who never would" moment 43 years early here, as he tells Lobos he could freeze him as revenge, but states that his conscience would never let him. It was so Tennant-like I thought Bill was about to start crying. I love how Vicki is so determined to go back and save Barbara, and as a result our heroes all end up captured again, their fate in the hands of Lobos. The only thing that saves them in this story is Vicki's revolution. Vicki saves the day! Yay! I love that. It's quite brutal, though, the way even when Lobos knows the game is up and has decided to run away, he still stops to kill our heroes. He hasn't really been that nasty in this story as such, prior to this, and it's his downfall. If he'd just run away he'd have escaped. See kids, wasting time with sadism gets you nowhere! That's the moral of the story.

I've never had a problem with the line, "have any arms fallen into Xeron hands?" It sounds daft, but there's nothing actually wrong with it as a sentence. Oh lord, the resolution is the Edge of Destruction all over again. This was all caused by a thing in the TARDIS getting stuck, which meant they landed in the wrong time track, whatever that happens to mean. I love the way when the Doctor is about to start shouting at Ian, Barbara very quickly apologises him and asks about the thing he took from the museum. She's a clever one, that Babs. Still, considering it's the Time-Space Visualiser we see in the next story, how on earth did the Doctor get it in the TARDIS? It's far too big. It's a nice little way to lead in to the next story, as is the sudden appearance of the Daleks, to create a lovely cliffhanger moment.

It's a fairly run-of-the-mill final episode, but it's also a lovely one. Essentially the day is saved because of how our heroes have interacted with and influenced the people they've met. Their impact on a world is also the means of saving them. I like that idea, especially as it was Vicki whose impact was the decisive one. It's a nice, warm conclusion for a nice, warm story. 7.5/10

Conclusion

I know it's not a popular story, but I really enjoy the Space Museum. That may seem odd, as I've done little but criticise it, but it's gentle, affectionate criticism rather than exasperated criticism, as we'll get with some stories (I'm looking at you, Underworld). It is very silly, but it was written as a comedy, so I don't see that as a failing. The Moroks are useless because they're bored and don't really want to be on Xeros. This is the first story I've come across which has survived losing Hartnell for an episode without losing interest. I love it. Season Two is really firing on all cylinders now. I reckon it could even pull off a Dalek comedy story at this stage...

Average Rating: 8

Old Rating: 8

New Rating: 8