Galaxy 4 and Mission to the Unknown

Four Hundred Dawns

There is no twist in this story about how the Drahvins are actually baddies. It's made perfectly clear right from when we meet them that they are. Though many seem to think the story is about the shock of attractive people turning out to be evil whilst the ugly are good, the story is actually just about people trying to get off a dying planet. Not that we could exactly mock anyway even if the story was about that, considering how vain and looks-obsessed society is at the moment. A story like that would be more worthwhile now than in the 60s.

Anyway, Steven had a shave in the last story, and is now having a haircut here. All very good to see (or not see). The stock incidental music used here is effective, and the Chumbley noise is very good, so the story does sound good, if nothing else. The existing clip is nice to see.

Vicki realises very quickly that the Drahvins want them dead, doesn't she? And the Drahvins are from Galaxy 4. Bit of an odd name for the story, then. It's like naming the Dalek Invasion of Earth Skaro, or any story with a Time Lord Kasterborous. And they arrived four hundred dawns ago, which is also a slightly odd name for this episode, then.

The plot of this story is pretty thin. I can forgive opening episodes, and this one is okay, and potentially sets up a good story of a fight for survival. For that, 5/10.

Trap of Steel

Okay, the Drahvins admit to being evil. But that's about it. The Drahvins have a chat with Steven, he philosophises a bit and the Doctor and Vicki go for a walk. Somehow that takes up twenty-five minutes. It's the small moments that save this from being completely awful. Vicki's "I noted, observed, collated, concluded, and then I threw a rock," is a great moment. Steven trying to make the Drahvin drone realise that Maaga getting "special" things is unfair is, if not a great moment, is a fun moment. What is good is where Steven forces the Drahvins to take him as a hostage rather than Vicki.

I'm struggling a bit now. The scenes go on forever without much happening. And Vicki screams, which is sad. I'm going to give this a slightly generous score for its moments of charm. 4/10.

Air Lock

Yes. The title says it all really. Air Lock. When you're calling an episode Air Lock, you know you're in trouble. Vicki chats to the Rills, then to the Doctor, then the Doctor and Vicki chat to the Rills. The sound is great, the story less so. Maaga's speech about being the only one who can think is quite nice. But, gosh, it was her who killed the Drahvin, not the Rills. The Doctor almost kills the Rills. The Rills are quite nice, and quite interesting, but still very little is actually happening. You almost get the impression Maaga wants to fail. 2/10

The Exploding Planet

And now it grinds to a standstill, and we watch the Doctor plugging the TARDIS in to the Rill ship and waiting for it to fill up with energy. Fun. And the Drahvins, who will die if they don't manage to take the TARDIS or the Rill ship (or even just, you know, say sorry), just stand about watching and doing absolutely nothing. I like the way the Rill says, "you from the solar system, we from another space". William Emms is so bored by now he can't even be bothered to let the Rills know where they're from. This is the worst individual episode of Doctor Who since way back in the Screaming Jungle in the Keys of Marinus. Oh, and Vicki hurt her ankle somehow. Uneventful and painfully dull. 1/10

Conclusion

It's difficult to believe I liked this story first time around, and I even think I may have been generous with my score here. It does have good elements. Hartnell, O'Brien and Purves, for example. The Chumblies are fun, and the sounds and stock music are effective. I wanted to like this. I always feel for stories unpopular with fandom, because a large number are very unfairly unpopular. But nothing actually happens in this story. I prefer longer stories, and I think 42 minutes is far too short for a Doctor Who story, but this could be told easily in one episode. It's a sad way to start the third season, and it is by far my least favourite story so far. The best thing about the story? The cliffhanger at the end is brilliant. Now Season Three can really begin...

Average rating: 3

Old Rating: 7

New Rating: 3

Mission to the Unknown

Goodbye Verity. This is the last story with Verity Lambert's name in the credits. She was an absolute wonder. One of the very best producers in the show's history, and in many ways the most important. So I'd like to take this moment to say thank you, Verity, for everything. You are sorely missed.

I've debated whether or not to count this on its own, and I have decided to anyway, even though it is a prelude to the Daleks' Master Plan (or prequel, as the new series would bafflingly call it). It's arguably more a part of the story than the Feast of Steven, but the break caused by the Myth Makers kind of makes it its own story.

Right from the start the quality is so much higher than the previous story. George Prince did the sound on Galaxy 4, and was the best thing about the story, but he's truly excelled himself here. The jungle on Kembel sounds brilliant. The stock music is effective, too. The atmosphere alone is just so far superior to the nothingness of Galaxy 4.

The Varga plants are quite a nasty idea. As is Marc Cory, 007 of the galaxy. He very calmly kills Garvey at the start of this story. Lowery's reaction is quite good, too. It is a bit cold of him to say "I don't see why that should concern us" when Cory tells him of all the worlds the Daleks are conquering, because they're far away. It doesn't make him an especially endearing character. But Cory knows they're up to something, and knows that Kembel would be an ideal place for them to amass. Lucky the Daleks are predictable, then. I love how they use a tape recorder to send their distress message. They even say it's "like a tape recorder".

So, all they have to do is stay alive until help comes? Whoops, the Daleks have destroyed your ship! Whoops, Lowery has been Varga'd. So much for that plan, then. So, the Daleks have a secret meeting with their allies to discuss their plans. Fine. So they play it over a loudspeaker system to allow anybody who might be on the planet to hear it! Huh? Why? For starters, they know there are humans there! They've already had to reassure Malpha and co. about them. Is there any particular reason why Earth is first on their list of places to conquer? Some might say the Daleks have an unhealthy obsession with Earth.

Cory manages to kill Varga-Lowery, but then gets bumped off by the Daleks rather easily. The Daleks win this story. That must be an unusual feeling for them.

This is a great little story. It's a perfect appetiser for the Daleks' Master Plan, and a good story in its own right. It's atmospheric and interesting and very unusual. This is more like it. 8/10.

The Time Meddler (and thoughts on Season Two)

Disclaimer: Just in case any pedants read this, I know that in the Hand of Fear, it's Eldrad, not Eldred. But still...

The Watcher

As if Ian and Barbara's exit hadn't been so painful already, we get more of a reminder here, as the Doctor and Vicki sadly talk of how they shall be missed. The Doctor admits what he showed in the Chase, that he wasn't expecting them to leave, and that it took him by surprise and was a real blow. The Doctor has never been this vulnerable as he again asks Vicki if she really wants to be with him. The scene between them is so sweet, as is Vicki's "they weren't getting any younger" about Ian and Barbara, and the Doctor's amused response. It's when Steven shows up, of course, that we get the famous buggering speech, which is sheer poetry. It is the best description of the TARDIS I think we've ever had. Steven's scepticism is nice, almost a reminder of Ian and his refusal to believe the TARDIS could travel in time back in An Unearthly Child. I know it's childish, but I also like the way Steven keeps calling the Doctor "Doc", before hastily adding the "tor". I also like Vicki's, "it is very small outside, it's just in here it's big", and Steven saying the TARDIS has a "way out" design.

The moving sky is rather impressive. It's very fast moving, but impressive nonetheless. Of course, out here we get the famous "I'm not a mountain goat, and I prefer walking to any day. And I hate climbing" speech from the Doctor. It works for splitting the regulars up, though. It leaves the Doctor on his own to charm Hur! Oops, I mean Edith. Alethea Charlton is just as cute as a Saxon as she was as a cavewoman, and the scenes between her and the Doctor are lovely. The Doctor drinks mead and asks for more, and even plays the "I'm an old man" card to get her on side! And then yet again we get a mention of Barbara, as the Doctor wishes she were there, and then proceeds to speak out loud about Stamford Bridge and Hastings with Edith standing right there! So much for not interfering, Doctor!

The Doctor off on his own also allows Vicki and Steven to have a lot of time together. O'Brien and Purves make a very good team. I love the way Vicki's already angrily ordering him about when he ignores her. I like that Steven doesn't believe they've travelled back in time, and then finds a watch lying about! It's quite late in the episode by now, and I think the audience could have been forgiven for thinking this was a historical, so that must have been quite the surprise. Even more of one when the Doctor finds the record playing! I love how he sees it and just starts giggling.

Lovely introduction to a season closer. It's an intriguing story, and the Monk for now is very interesting. It's not so far off being faultless 9/10.

The Meddling Monk

What's that? William Hartnell is on holiday AGAIN? He just took one two stories ago! Oh well, it's lucky Vicki and Steven are so watchable. The Monk's fry-up is rather lovely. It's rather obvious already that he's not exactly an evil, scheming villain (if it wasn't already from the fact that it's Peter Butterworth, anyway).

I know we get plenty of characters who are there to perform a specific function, particularly in Terry Nation stories, but Eldred (MUST LIVE!) is just really bad. "They're evil, I don't trust them, they must die!" Why? Aside from him briefly thinking the "travellers" raped Edith in this episode, there isn't actually any need in the story for the Saxons not to trust Vicki and Steven. It's never even mentioned when Eldred isn't there. If he'd managed to convince the Saxons that our heroes were spies and got them in trouble then he'd have made sense, but he doesn't actually do anything of value. Anyway, accusing Vicki of raping Edith is a bit bizarre, no? Also on that subject, the Vikings talk of lying low so their attack can be a surprise. Erm, so why go and rape Edith? And not only that, leave her alive so she can report the presence of Vikings?

There's another thing that doesn't really come to anything. Steven and Vicki talk to the Monk, and Steven uses the clever "get the bad guy to reveal something he couldn't possibly know" trick to find out that the Monk has abducted the Doctor. But then Vicki says that the Monk gave himself away too easily. "He'd be pretty stupid to give himself away like that," she says. However this whole scene is never mentioned again, as Vicki and Steven break in easily and get to the Doctor's cell without trouble. So it seems that the Monk actually was that stupid. Oh well.

As usual, the story suffers a little without the presence of Hartnell, but not so much. Vicki and Steven carry the story very well, and are always good to watch. This episode involves a lot of setting up for later, but it still is very enjoyable. 7.5/10.

A Battle of Wits

Hmm, the Monk really is stupid. He doesn't know about the secret passage. He gives Eldred (must live) penicillin. He's actually going out of his way to help somebody. It is quite lovely, I think, that the enemy in the story wants nothing except a bit of fun. He's perfectly willing to help others. That said, he is planning to kill a whole load of Vikings, so maybe he isn't quite that nice? He's not really very smart, either, asking Wulnoth to light a load of beacon fires. Vicki was right, after all. Saxon villages are very cosy and lovely, aren't they? Travellers welcomed with mead and smiles (except by the Kastrians), the men willing to go out of their way to help. It's all very nice. I'm sure it was just like that.

The Doctor and Edith have another scene together. They are such a sweet pair, although she's clearly been hurt and the Doctor doesn't think to ask her if she's okay! But then, he isn't thinking at all, as he tells her of the soon to come Viking invasion (again)! He's being bloody irresponsible considering what this whole story is about, isn't he? But then he is a "curious fellow", apparently. I can't believe he says "no more monkery" to the Monk. Sheesh, Doctor! I love how when the monastery is attacked by a couple of Vikings, the Doctor and the Monk knock them both out! The cliffhanger to this episode is rather good. Blimey, it's a TARDIS!

I like this episode. Yes, it involves a lot of the Doctor and the Monk playing their silly games, and Vicki and Steven worrying about the TARDIS, but it's great to watch. 8/10

Checkmate

This is all wrapped up very quickly. There's time for the Doctor to have a long chat with Edith (after she frees them and saves the day!), write a letter to the Monk and then stroll with Vicki and Steven back to the TARDIS. That's no complaint, though. Apparently the Doctor is "50 years earlier" than the Monk. I wonder how the people who wrote that the Doctor was at the academy with "Mortimus" reconciled that one. Or why they chose such a ridiculous name. Anyway, the Monk's "camouflage unit" is working, apparently.

Steven's musings on history are quite interesting, actually. The fact that we wouldn't know if history had changed. Although if it were going to change, it would have happened already, since it's the past. I love the bit where the Doctor and Vicki chant together about how "history will be allowed to take its natural course". It's a lovely scene, recalling the first episode of this story and just gives off the impression of a pair who have been travelling together for such a long time. I also love the way Vicki tells Steven that the Doctor is the crew, they're just the travellers, and the Doctor adds, "both very welcome ones!" It's all very sweet.

It's a fun final episode, with an exploration of another TARDIS. It's funny, the Doctor says all this stuff about not interfering, yet he does so himself, and his solution to the Monk's meddling is to strand the Monk in 1066! Very interesting logic there, Doctor. 8/10.

Conclusion

The Time Meddler is gentle, but it's a lovely way to finish the second season and introduce Steven. It may not be the most action packed, or even contain a huge amount of actual story, but it's about the Doctor and the Monk, and Steven and Vicki and their relationships. They all have a number of lovely scenes throughout the story, whether it's the Doctor charming Edith, Vicki and Steven arguing about whether or not there's a secret passage, or any scene that contains the Monk. Dennis Spooner is as dependable as ever, and it's sad to see him go as script editor, as he's done a superb job. It's a lovely story, and a lovely and happy way to end the season.

Average Rating: 8.125

Old Rating: 8

New Rating: 8

Season Two

Season Two has always been one I've enjoyed greatly, and it hasn't disappointed here at all. If it weren't for the two Dalek stories it would be right up there with the very best, and it is easily superior to Season One anyway. Planet of Giants and the Web Planet aren't classics, by any means, but they're both far superior to their reputation, and deserve far more credit for what they do. As for the Space Museum, I absolutely adore it, and think its reputation is wholly unfair. I think the biggest surprise for me this season was only giving the Crusade seven out of ten.

So far in this marathon, the Romans is by a distance my favourite story. It is an absolutely brilliant story in every respect. Pure genius. Sadly, the Sensorites is still my lowest ranked story so far, although my lowest in this season was the Chase, which was another surprise. Anyway, this is a big season. The season got rid of the irritating Susan, which helped massively. Ian and Barbara left, and Vicki and Steven arrived. Vicki has been as wonderful as ever. She is so much better than Susan it's ridiculous. She's fun and funny, and her only scream in the entire season was for a joke. She also hasn't cried or whinged (aside from the "I'm redundant" bit in the Chase, also for comic effect). Ian and Barbara deserve their status as two of the very best companions the show has ever seen, and it's wonderful that nearly fifty years on from his first appearance, William Russell is still playing the role, and playing it brilliantly, on audio for Big Finish. Here's hoping Big Finish revolve their 50th celebrations around him.

The end of Season Two also marks the end of moving pictures. Season Two is virtually complete, and Season One is pretty intact, but for the next three seasons there won't be much in the way of moving pictures, which is very sad. Still, I'm eager to see how well Season Three fares. Oh, and so far in my marathon, the Hartnell era is averaging exactly 7 out of 10, which is very healthy. I can't see it going down in Season Three.

Average: 7.26

The Chase

The Executioners

The Daleks are back! Written by that Nation chap again, though. His second story in his last three which involves a new location each week, too. I love the idea of the Chase, though, and I always try so hard to like it. It's admirable and fun, and very undeservedly criticised. What it does have, however, is Richard Martin, and his directing seems to be getting worse. There's a scene in the TARDIS when the Doctor speaks right to camera where it looks like you can see the studio in the background. Then in the scenes with Ian and Vicki you can very clearly see the studio wall. Still, we do have Dudley back once more, for the third time this season, and he really brightens things up with his jaunty music.

The Time-Space Visualiser is a strange device. For some reason it has the planets of our solar system written all over it. Not entirely sure why. It's a fun way to start a story, though. I have to admit, I do really like the horribly contrived joke of Ian reading a book called "Monsters" and calling it far-fetched. I also unashamedly love that "what's that horrible noise?" joke with the Doctor and Barbara. The Daleks really start repeating things like mad in this story. This is the start of all of that, sadly. It makes Barbara look silly, too. Barbara and the Doctor watch the Daleks chanting "TARDIS" over and over and over again, and Barbara turns to the Doctor to say, "they said TARDIS!" Gee, thanks Barbara. I'd never have noticed!

Gosh, a desert planet called Aridius? How original. I have to admit, I do find that a lazy method of naming. Why not just go the whole way and call it "The Desert Planet"? Still, I shouldn't complain, at least the Aridians themselves actually have names! The Moroks in the previous story didn't even get that luxury (Lobos aside).

This is, in spite of everything, a relatively fun opening episode. I know half of it is spent watching the regulars watching TV, but it's warm, cosy and fun. Ian and Barbara are just so right, and part of the furniture, so to speak, just as much a part of the show as the Doctor at this point. It's hard to believe this is their last story. It's always been sad, but I fear that watching like this will make that point even sadder. Still, that's not for a while yet, and here we have a promising-ish story on our hands, even with the ridiculous choking Dalek rising through the sand. 7.5/10.

The Death of Time

Well, Terry is at least trying with his titles now, but the Death of Time? What? That title has no relevance to this episode whatsoever. Oh well. I suppose it needed a dramatic title because it's such a dull episode.

Vicki screams here, which is totally out of character, but once again it's all for a joke, as Ian tells her that running is a better option (judging by the comment on this joke, whoever wrote the article about this story on the BBC Doctor Who website doesn't appear to have ever seen Vicki before). Then straight after that Ian stops to gawp at one of the mire beasts, and Vicki tells him that running is a smarter idea. That's about the most interesting thing about this episode, though. Though Ian calling a Dalek Fred, and the Doctor calling it Auntie are also highlights. Also, the Dalek shoots right at Ian, who waits for a few seconds before deciding to duck. Clearly Dalek rays are very very slow moving!

I like the reference to the previous story as Ian asks for Barbara's cardigan and she says, "not again!" Ian says he needs it for the Dalek and Vicki says, "I hope it looks good on him". I do like the humour in this story, it's just a shame there's not much to this episode. The Aridians are a pretty dull bunch. Dudley's music is great again, though, which helps. Fun music gives you something to latch on to when the story itself is struggling. 4/10

Flight through Eternity

Well, there's a flight. Not sure the Empire State Building and the Mary Celeste exactly count as eternity, but it's a more accurate title than the previous episode! The Daleks shoot the TARDIS at the start of this episode, even though they established last week that they can't damage it, so what's the point? Why does the Doctor think they gave the Daleks a good hiding? They managed to make one fall off a sand dune. The first thick Dalek appears here, uhming and ahing. To be fair, though, they all seem pretty stupid. Maybe Dalek high command have decided to send all the stupid Daleks after the Doctor in the hope he'll get rid of them?

What can you say about Morton Dill? Well, for one, I like the joke where Barbara says, "you're from Earth?" and he replies, "no Ma'am, I'm from Alabama". So New York was destroyed during the events of the Dalek Invasion of Earth? Funny, I'd have thought they'd just concentrate on Bedfordshire, myself. I love how the Doctor accidentally says "no it ain't" to Dill. I love the way the Dalek's head spins right the way round when Dill walks around it. That's quite creepy, but I'm not entirely sure why the Dalek doesn't kill him. Dill laughs at it, makes fun of its voice and generally gets in the way! He must be one of the luckiest people alive. The Daleks were killing Aridians that were helping them just 25 minutes ago!

Barbara very stupidly gets herself caught on the Mary Celeste. In her final story she should really know better by now. It does allow Vicki to save the day again, though by bashing somebody on the head. Then for no apparent reason she bashes Ian on the head. That's twice in two episodes Ian has been knocked out. No wonder he's so keen to leave at the end of this story! I love the way that when the Daleks arrive everybody jumps off the ship, even though the Daleks actually don't want to kill them, just ask them a few questions.

The cliffhangers in this story are rubbish. This episode's cliffhanger is "the Daleks are still chasing the TARDIS". Great. It's arguably the worst cliffhanger so far, since it's absolutely identical to the one at the end of the Space Museum AND at the end of the previous episode! When the best cliffhangers of a story involve a Dalek rising from sand and coughing, and a robot Doctor saying he shall infiltrate and kill, you know you're in trouble. Anyway, this episode is okay, but nothing special. It's fun in bits, but it's quite unsatisfying, really. 5/10

Journey Into Terror

Now this somehow is a lot more fun. It's ridiculous, but it is actually enjoyable. I love Ian's statement that this is a perfect place to fight the Daleks because there are good, stout walls. Yes Ian, those Daleks hate stout walls. Still, he redeems himself by saying they won't like the stairs. The Doctor for some reason says, "we'd better check where Vicki and Barbara is". That should be "are", Doctor. According to the Doctor, "this house is what you'd expect in a nightmare. We're in a world of dreams...we're in the dark recesses of the human mind". Ian, who questions almost everything the Doctor says, accepts that! Maybe the repeated blows to Ian's head have done him more damage than we think? The actual explanation is a fairly obvious one, after all.

I find it interesting that one of the Daleks says to Dracula, "I am a Dalek". It's quite unusual for a Dalek to say that. The directing is really messy around this point, and it is a bit strange that they don't notice they've left without Vicki. Ian's plan to take the Dalek time machine is quite mad, too. The Daleks screaming "Embark!" over and over again is also a bit silly. And we get another Dalek saying "er" a lot. The Doctor Robot is a bit rubbish. Aside from anything else, it changes in appearance depending on whether it's a long shot or a close up. In the close up it looks identical to Hartnell, but from the longer shots it looks a lot like Edmund Warwick. The Daleks are clearly no good at building robots.

This episode is a bit rubbish, really, but a lot of fun. The scenes in the "recesses of the human mind" are silly, but fun. 6.5/10

The Death of Doctor Who

The Death of Doctor Who? I know this isn't a great story, but it's not that bad! Sorry all, but I had to say that. Dudley's music has suddenly perked up here as we arrive on Mechanus. It's great! Distracts from the story, too, which helps. Particularly as Richard Martin has totally lost the plot, in more ways than one. This is a jungle planet, so helpfully we get lots of long shots of the studio floor. Anyway, the whole two Doctor thing is quite fun, particularly Vicki thinking the real Doctor is the robot. Then the two Doctors fight! Great fun. However, although that is all enjoyable in itself, this entire episode revolves around that one scene. Pretty much nothing else happens, and it is a pretty ridiculous plan by the Daleks anyway. Why on earth do that rather than just do the work themselves, far more easily?

Frankly, the only other thing of note in this episode is one lovely moment where Ian suggests that the Doctor pretends to be the robot to hold off the Daleks for a bit. Barbara angrily tells Ian that it's far too dangerous, but behind their backs the Doctor goes off to try anyway. It's a very sweet moment. Maybe my knowledge that they're leaving in under half an hour makes it even sweeter. They've come so far.

In spite of very little happening, this is a fun episode to watch, but quite weak plot-wise. Ian and Barbara deserve better than this. 5/10.

The Planet of Decision

As with the final episode of the Dalek Invasion of Earth, the mark for this part will be skewed somewhat. The episode itself is pretty rubbish, but that isn't remotely important. What is important is that this is Ian and Barbara's final episode. It's so touching. I wish the new series could do the big emotional scenes as well as this. As I said in the Dalek Invasion of Earth, Hartnell is really terrific in moments like this. It's quite sad to think that this is also his last one, as his later companions weren't allowed such send-offs. He plays the Doctor's sadness here beautifully. I love the way that the regular pattern takes place of Ian and the Doctor disagreeing and shouting at each other before Barbara comes in to placate the Doctor and sweetly appeal to him. Only this time, for the first time ever, her efforts fail because The Doctor is so desperate to not let them leave. He's selfish, but he is because he's come to depend on Ian and Barbara, and never faced up to the possibility they might actually want to leave. It's a lovely touch that it's Vicki's intervention (and her assurance that she isn't going to leave him) that finally persuades the Doctor to allow them to leave. Then when Vicki and the Doctor are watching the Time-Space Visualiser and see that Ian and Barbara have made it, Vicki's reaction of joy that they're safe is a nice contrast to the heartbreaking sadness of the Doctor. Ian and Barbara are the ultimate companions, and shall be missed terribly.

The rest of the episode is a bit rubbish, really. I like the Mechonoids, and I love their voices, but not a lot happens, and the fight between the Mechonoids and the Daleks is rather dull. They're more fun when they're talking, bizarrely, like when a Dalek asks a Mechonoid where the "space travellers" are, for some reason the Mechonoid answers, "zero". Then one of the Daleks later screams "am exterminated!" Ian pretending to be a Dalek at the end is rather silly, as are the scenes of Ian and Barbara back home. I do have to say, I worry about how they managed to explain disappearing off the face of the Earth for two years! I hope they got out of it okay. Steven's first appearance is okay, but not particularly exciting.

So, to sum up, the episode itself is pretty useless, but Ian and Barbara's farewell is so touching it bumps the score up massively. 7/10.

Conclusion

Hmm. I've given this a (marginally) worse score than the first two Dalek stories. I love stories that are fun and silly, but somehow the Chase although it aims to be, somehow falls short and just ends up being dull for long stretches. It has good moments, but I just find stories like this quite unsatisfying generally. I tried hard to like it, but it's just awkwardly stuck between silly and serious. Richard Martin is at his poorest, and Terry Nation doesn't help matters much. It's sad that Ian and Barbara, the definitive companions, get such a poor final story, but at least they get a wonderful exit, an exit which makes wading through this story entirely worthwhile. Sorry, although 6 out of 10 is a good mark, it is a slightly inflated one, and this story must go down as a fail.

Average score: 5.83

Old Rating: 7

New Rating: 6

The Space Museum

The Space Museum

I love the Space Museum, and I'm not ashamed to say so. And I mean the whole story, not just the first episode! The beginning itself is great, too. "We've got our clothes on!" exclaims Ian as they find they've suddenly changed from their Crusader clothes to normal clothes. "I should hope so!" the Doctor replies, before adding that it would save them the bother of changing. I love how the Doctor thinks it's a bother to change clothes! Subtly setting up the JNT era costumes, maybe? This is clearly a forward-thinking story, as not only does it set up the 80s, it also sets up Moffat's era! Vicki gets a glass of water, and then looks at something off-screen which causes her to drop the glass. She saw one of the Silence! The scene works perfectly if you watch it like that, and it's a much better reason for her to drop the glass than "the plot needs her to".

I should point out that (for a change) I love Vicki's outfit here. Particularly her socks. Anyway, you can tell this is Mervyn Pinfield directing, as we get a loud jang of music as Ian says "why aren't we leaving any footprints?" Then we get another one later as Vicki's arm goes right through the, erm, thing in the museum she's looking at. Which brings me to another point. If they aren't really there, and can walk through walls and so on, why is the floor solid? Why don't they just drop through the ground? I know, I know, you wouldn't have a story. There are many Star Trek episodes where I've asked that question, too. Oh yes, and another problem. Why do the TARDIS crew rush out of sight when they see people, and why does Vicki try desperately not to sneeze? They have no idea at this point that the Moroks are hostile! Why not try and say hello? They've never rushed off to hide before they've met anybody ever before. It's peculiar.

I like Hartnell's "fluorescent substance" fluff. He's determined to get it out! He gets there eventually. The bit where they meet the Dalek is good, too, and where Vicki calls it friendly. She says they've learnt about Daleks in history books, but strangely their books only describe the Daleks, and don't use pictures. I refuse to believe that not one photograph of the Daleks survived their invasion! That's just not possible. Ian's response to her friendly comment is, "you wouldn't say that if we ever meet them again". Very subtle foreshadowing there...

I love this story. I know it seems as if I've just been complaining about it, but they're trifles. The story itself is enormous fun. It's mysterious and plays about with time in a way we haven't really seen before. Although it's stock music, the bit at the end as they "arrive" is terrific, it really sets the mood very well. I can't quite justify giving this full marks, but I love it dearly nonetheless. 9/10.

Dimensions of Time

Now, this is, according to everyone and their dogs, where the story falls apart. I beg to differ. It's hilarious, for one thing. The exposition spouted by Lobos near the beginning of this episode is priceless. It's not usually something I notice or care about, but it's so blatant here. I like Richard Shaw's performance, too. He plays Lobos as rather bored and uninterested, which he should be.

I don't want to criticise Dennis Spooner, since he's terrific as both a script writer and story editor, but I assume he's reponsible for the business with Ian's button at the start of this episode. Ian has lost a button, which the Doctor finds very interesting, claiming the least important things often lead to the greatest discoveries. Here though, it doesn't, as the button is never mentioned again! I assume it was there for some point. Maybe it wasn't, and it was just Glyn Jones making the valuable point that though small and seemingly unimportant things can lead to the greatest discoveries, they often don't.

The Xerons are a dull bunch, I do admit that. They're very strange too. "We'll kidnap the old man or the girl, explain our situation and they can then introduce us to the others". Yes, that's absolutely foolproof as a plan! The dramatic music as the Doctor is kidnapped is awful, made even worse by the fact that we know the Doctor isn't in danger, since we know already that the Xerons are harmless. I love how the Doctor pretends to faint, and they fall for it! Then he hides in a Dalek and, in a Dalek voice, says, "I fought them off, I am the master!" It's fantastic, and then he walks right into a couple of guards. Hartnell's having a great time in this episode. He gets kidnapped, pretends to faint, knocks somebody out, hides in a Dalek, gets captured again and has a very enjoyable interrogation scene with Lobos all in 25 minutes! And people call this dull? The interrogation scene is excellent fun. The Doctor's chuckling as he outwits Lobos is lovely. It's a shame Hartnell's going on holiday. Once again, I think the story won't be able to cope without him. I love how he suggests Lobos should lower the price of admission.

As soon as the Doctor is catpured, Ian becomes really bitchy to Barbara and Vicki as they try and get out of the museum. He keeps on shouting and losing his temper at everything. Eventually he calms down. Then he exclaims, "the minotaur!" and rushes at Barbara, pulling her top off! We'll have none of that, Ian! Their despair as they fail to find a way out of the museum is very well played, though, and right near the end of the episode, they find the TARDIS! How very exciting.

This is great. I really don't get its poor reputation. Lobos makes for an interesting villain. The exposition very nicely tells us why the Moroks are a bit crap (they're bored). The Xerons are a pretty wet bunch, but that pays off quite well later as Vicki leads the revolution, so I don't mind. The scenes with the Doctor are funny, the scenes with Vicki, Ian and Barbara are fairly tense and desperate as they lose the Doctor and struggle to find a way out. It's brilliant. 8/10.

The Search

The Morok Commander (who doesn't get to have a name) gets some nice exposition at the beginning of this episode, whinging about how he always gets blamed for everything. I say nice because it really echoes the whinging by Lobos in the previous episode. Maybe all Moroks tend to talk in exposition? They also use bizarre sentence construction, as he says to a guard, "why was not the cutting equipment brought to me?" I guess that happens to people who don't get to have names, they can't even speak properly. I like how he tells Lobos that our heroes could be in any of a thousand places, and Lobos says he expects a thousand places to be searched, while all the time the people they're after are eavesdropping on them.

The Morok who captures Ian, Barbara and Vicki is rather dim, isn't he? He just stands there while they huddle and have a long conversation. It's directed in a way that you could almost forget he's there, as he's off camera and Ian is happily chatting about escape plans. The Morok finally tells them to shut up after giving them about half an hour to discuss matters and decide on a plan. It's all rather amusing, really. Ian's fight with two Moroks is rather amusing, too, and there's also quite a sweet moment as he is reunited with Delos from the Romans, who is now in the guise of a Morok technician called, er, Morok technician. Why is Lobos the only Morok with a bloody name? And why is Morok technician called that anyway? There is no reference anywhere in the story to him being a technician, beyond him being called that in the credits! It's Lobos who does all the technology stuff in episode four to revive the Doctor, after all. Nothing makes sense in this story.

At least the Xerons have names, even if they are a pathetic bunch. Vicki's pretty disgusted with them. They babble about how good they are at planning. She wants to lead a revolution! What a moment for Vicki, she does actually start a planet-wide revolution. I'm not convinced by her saying that she wants the revolution because, "I have as many reasons as you, perhaps more". More? For her, her own life and the life of her three friends are at stake. For the Xerons their entire planet and civilisation is at stake! Somehow I think they have the greater claim there, Vicki.

This is a fairly uneventful episode, but it does hold up very well in Hartnell's absence, which is a very rare thing. Vicki starts a revolution, Barbara is gassed and Ian is captured, then escapes and manages to hold up Lobos with a gun. Ian says it might be enjoyable to kill Lobos! Blimey, Ian! Stripping Barbara, wanting to kill people. What's got into you? Anyway, not so much happens, but it's a very enjoyable not so much. 7.5/10.

The Final Phase

Lobos changes his mind about the Doctor's condition very quickly. One minute, "he's as good as dead," and the next he's saying that there's a only a chance the Doctor may not recover. Perhaps he was lying? The Doctor apparently gets rheumatism in cold temperatures. Clearly that doesn't stay with Time Lords for every regeneration. The Doctor states that, "my brain was working at the speed of a mechanical computer". Wow, that fast, eh? These Time Lords. Whatever will they dazzle us with next?

The Doctor has an "I'm the man who never would" moment 43 years early here, as he tells Lobos he could freeze him as revenge, but states that his conscience would never let him. It was so Tennant-like I thought Bill was about to start crying. I love how Vicki is so determined to go back and save Barbara, and as a result our heroes all end up captured again, their fate in the hands of Lobos. The only thing that saves them in this story is Vicki's revolution. Vicki saves the day! Yay! I love that. It's quite brutal, though, the way even when Lobos knows the game is up and has decided to run away, he still stops to kill our heroes. He hasn't really been that nasty in this story as such, prior to this, and it's his downfall. If he'd just run away he'd have escaped. See kids, wasting time with sadism gets you nowhere! That's the moral of the story.

I've never had a problem with the line, "have any arms fallen into Xeron hands?" It sounds daft, but there's nothing actually wrong with it as a sentence. Oh lord, the resolution is the Edge of Destruction all over again. This was all caused by a thing in the TARDIS getting stuck, which meant they landed in the wrong time track, whatever that happens to mean. I love the way when the Doctor is about to start shouting at Ian, Barbara very quickly apologises him and asks about the thing he took from the museum. She's a clever one, that Babs. Still, considering it's the Time-Space Visualiser we see in the next story, how on earth did the Doctor get it in the TARDIS? It's far too big. It's a nice little way to lead in to the next story, as is the sudden appearance of the Daleks, to create a lovely cliffhanger moment.

It's a fairly run-of-the-mill final episode, but it's also a lovely one. Essentially the day is saved because of how our heroes have interacted with and influenced the people they've met. Their impact on a world is also the means of saving them. I like that idea, especially as it was Vicki whose impact was the decisive one. It's a nice, warm conclusion for a nice, warm story. 7.5/10

Conclusion

I know it's not a popular story, but I really enjoy the Space Museum. That may seem odd, as I've done little but criticise it, but it's gentle, affectionate criticism rather than exasperated criticism, as we'll get with some stories (I'm looking at you, Underworld). It is very silly, but it was written as a comedy, so I don't see that as a failing. The Moroks are useless because they're bored and don't really want to be on Xeros. This is the first story I've come across which has survived losing Hartnell for an episode without losing interest. I love it. Season Two is really firing on all cylinders now. I reckon it could even pull off a Dalek comedy story at this stage...

Average Rating: 8

Old Rating: 8

New Rating: 8

The Crusade

The Lion

Back in a historical adventure and everybody is very happy. Especially David Whitaker, you feel, as he finally gets a proper length non-gimmicky story to tell! The story begins with a big fight scene. Not necessarily a bad thing, get that out the way so we can have the story. Ian's section of the fight is quite good, though, and we have Dudley Simpson back and all over his second Doctor Who story. This time, though, it's good. I wasn't keen on his score for Planet of Giants, but this is recognisably (good) Dudley. In all the chaos, Barbara gets kidnapped. Poor old Babs. Ian searches the woods for over an hour for her, which is rather impressive.

Bernard Kay is always good, and here is possibly his best role. He's terrific here. "I cannot dispense life and death lightly," he says as he considers Barbara's fate. It's quite funny when Barbara tells Saladin of all her adventures (like the Sensorites, she lists all the stories, though not quite so blatantly here), and he thinks she's part of a group of actors.

This isn't a brilliant episode, it takes too long to start, but once it really gets going it's very watchable, and good fun. 7/10

The Knight of Jaffa

Who'd have thought the title of this referred to Ian? Sorry, Sir Ian, Knight of Jaffa. So far the only companion to be knighted. It's a lovely moment, though. I love how the Doctor quickly and easily calms Richard's temper with rather arse-licky comments like, "it's a King's preorogative to make yesterday's deafness today's keen hearing". He's a good manipulator, and all of his scenes with the Chamberlain and Ben Daheer are a delight, as are the scenes of Vicki pretending to be a boy called Victor. Richard says that the Doctor, Vicki and Ian have "courage, loyalty and wit", which is quite nice. 

 

Luigi Ferrigo's a git, isn't he? He kindaps Barbara for El Akir. It's quite good that the bit of fun Barbara had in the first episode, pretending to be Joanna, now means that El Akir is her enemy. El Akir is the only properly villainous character in this story (for now), and he makes for quite a good one, even if he is played by somebody called Walter! 

 

Once Richard's petulance is soothed, both he and Saladin are portrayed very well in this episode, from Richard's keeness to stop the fighting: "this bloodletting must stop," and Saladin's smartness in very quickly and easily working out that Luigi kidnapped Barbara. 

 

This is a good episode, certainly. Ian's quick to go off after Barbara, who herself is very resourceful, regularly escaping from El Akir's clutches throughout this story. The scenes with the Doctor and Vicki are great fun. 8/10.

The Wheel of Fortune

Luckily this Wheel of Fortune comes Nicky Campbell-free. It does have Dudley Simpson going strange again, though. The music where Haroun is telling his sob story of how El Akir has wrecked his life is atrocious. Never mind, though, because this episode is just as strong as the last. I'd love to see Vicki transformed into a veritable strutting peacock, but sadly that doesn't happen, as Joanna finds out that "Victor" is actually a girl. The bits with Ben Daheer are rather funny again, as is Vicki's, "who's your friend?" at the Doctor, once Daheer has left. There's quite a sweet moment as Vicki worries that the Doctor doesn't really want her, and he gives her a big hug and prods her nose. I love the clothes she's given, too. They're ridiculous, but she looks great. Leicester's a right bugger though, isn't he? 

 

The scenes with Barbara and Haroun are quite nice, and then later as Barbara sacrifices herself to save Safiya. It leads to the cliffhanger, which is good, but considering she's escaped him a couple of times already, we're not too bothered. As Ian gets himself in trouble, and the Doctor and Vicki face Richard's wrath, is there really time in the final part to finish everything off? 8/10

The War Lords

The War Lords, eh? Nope, I don't see any Philip Madoc. Sadly no James Bree, either. Sorry to harp on about Dudley Simpson, but he is superb again here, which is nice. Unfortunately, the story isn't so much. I find the stuff with Ian and Ibrahim rather tedious, to be honest. It goes on for ages when there is really a lot of wrapping up to do, and as a result the ending is quite rushed. The best part of their relationship is right at the end when Ibrahim says of Ian, "he has an honest face, he could have made a fortune!"

The girls at the harem are all rather sweet, protecting Barbara from El Akir, and, well, we don't know exactly what happened to Fatima, but they certainly made her pay for betraying Barbara. El Akir is killed very quickly and easily, though, but it is nice to see the Haroun family reunion. 

 

With El Akir's quick demise, the true villain of this story is Leicester. He is a total git, going after the Doctor and Vicki and wanting them killed. I love how Ian makes him look a right prat, going on about how he has a much greater claim to execute the Doctor, and Leicester agrees! I do love that bit. 

This is a clumsy episode. Joanna, Saladin and Saphadin all disappear, as does Richard fairly promptly. El Akir/Haroun and their story are dealt with at the speed of light, whilst we have long scenes of Ian and Ibrahim not doing much, and the Doctor and Vicki hiding in the woods. The jokes at the end at Ian's expense are quite amusing, but overall it's an unsatisfactory conclusion. 5/10.

Conclusion

Well well, this is my lowest rated historical so far. The Crusade has never been one of my absolute favourites, but I expected to like it more than that. It's great in the middle two parts, but starts slowly and ends poorly, which drags it down a bit, for me. The final episode in particular is quite poor. There's also a problem with Richard and Saladin. Though Glover and Kay play them extremely well, and both are well written, they both seem a bit detached from the story somehow. It's difficult to explain, but I didn't think their presence really helped the story much. Joanna, again well played, was a bit uninteresting, I found. She had a few moments of charm, but just seemed to be there to have a quick shout at Richard and then vanish. I'm probably being harsh, as this IS a good story, it just seemed to be lacking a certain something that the other historicals have.

Average rating: 7

Old Rating: 8

New rating: 7

The Web Planet

The Web Planet

What an utterly extraordinary story the Web Planet is, and what an absolutely terrific first episode the Web Planet is. Set on a mysterious, barren, good looking world in which the regulars need breathing equipment, with terrific looking aliens in the Zarbi, a number of mysteries, a quadruple cliffhanger and William Hartnell at his absolute giggliest. What more could you want? Oh, and Vicki with an interesting hairstyle. I mean it, it's great. Whatever happens for the next five parts, this is a truly superb opening episode, even with Vicki's rather patronising view of Barbara. The world does look very good, and I love the Zarbi noises. Not much happens as such, but the regular cast are all always wonderful to watch, and it is a nice, mysterious, alien opening episode. Fun, promising start. 8/10

The Zarbi

We find here that we've landed on an alien planet that the Doctor already knows, and may even have visited. That's two in this season, both of which the Doctor knows, compared to the zero out of three or four (depending on An Unearthly Child) in the first season. It's quite a sudden shift, and I'm not sure how keen on it I am, really. It does present a different type of mystery though. "Why has this planet changed?" rather than, "where are we?" 

The Menoptera do look ridiculous at first with their stylised movements and silly voices, but I do have to admit that when you get used to it, it does work very well and helps add another dimension to their "alien-ness". Roslyn de Winter as Vrestin is particularly good throughout this story. Hardly surprising really, as she's credited with "Insect movement", which has to be one of my favourite credits. Maureen O'Brien follows up some dodgy flailing acting as the TARDIS is dragged with a wonderful despairing "help me"! Apparently the Animus can control gold, and anybody touching gold. Interesting idea. The story continues well, with more mystery, the Menoptera at this point not friendly, and our heroes seemingly in a lot of danger, and they're about to escape to even more. 7/10

Escape to Danger

It's a holiday for Jacqueline Hill this week. Last time she went away, the quality of the story dropped enormously. This time it's not so bad, but it does suffer without her because the Doctor, Vicki and Ian are all in the same place. That means there's not much variety of location in this episode, and when we do get it, it's just Ian and Vrestin having a nice long chat about the history of Vortis. There is a lot to like about this episode, though. That the Animus thinks the Doctor is a Menoptera is quite amusing. I love the Doctor saying to Ian, "I must do something about that face of yours", and when he tells the Animus to "drop this hair-dryer or whatever it is". The flying effect for the Menoptera is good too. The crowning achievement of this episode, though, is when a Zarbi charges headlong into the camera, which is hilarious. 

This episode isn't so bad, but it does lack a bit of energy. It also lacks directing, too. That cliffhanger is utterly abysmal. The worst so far, by a wide margin. Ian and Vrestin are running from some Zarbi, Vrestin apparently falls (though we don't see it), then we see a bit of soil falling on top of Ian, then we see some Zarbi milling about. I actually thought Richard Martin had been doing quite well until that point, but there you are. 5/10

Crater of Needles

And now it's better again. Hello Jacqueline Hill! The stock incidental music goes absolutely mad at the start of this episode, and then disappears again, which is bizarre. I like the Optera, actually. There are times when the way they speak reminds me of the Tenth Planet Cybermen. I love the word Isoptope. The moments with the Doctor and Vicki are the highlight of this episode, though, as the Doctor manages to make one of the gold controlling device things not work somehow with a magic bit of something-or-other. Well, that's as much sense as the script makes of it. If you only need gold to control somebody, why go to the bother of making those big, awkward things to put over people's shoulders? Why not just use, you know, rings? Or even a necklace. I know those things in the story are called necklaces, but that's just silly.

The cliffhanger is mucked up again, too. Why wait for Barbara and Prapillus to start running to safety before cutting? Especially as that is the resolution. In spite of all of that, this is an enjoyable episode as some more Menoptera show up and the Optera are introduced. 6/10

Invasion

Aside from Invasion being a horribly unimaginative title, the actual invasion happened in the previous episode. Bad start. That Hilio is an interesting chap, isn't he? He stands behind a wall to talk to Barbara and the rest of the Menoptera. I'm probably being picky, but he does it for no reason other than to give some "interesting" shots, which isn't really good motivation for standing behind a wall to talk to people, I find. I like how it's Barbara who convinces the Menoptera to actually attack the Animus, rather than just stand around and hope for the best, which they appear to want to do.

Vicki is rather fond of naming things, isn't she? She calls the Zarbi that the Doctor controls "Zombo". Next thing you know she'll be calling things Chumblies or something silly like that. That is quite a fun portion of the story, the Doctor leading the controlled Zarbi about. Hartnell's expressive hand and arm movements are rather amusing. Another decent episode here, I have to say. 6/10

The Centre

It did occur to me when Ian suddenly, randomly, and very conveniently appears by the Animus towards the end of this episode that he's been rather sidelined for the past three episodes. He's had interesting things to do, but absolutely nothing to do with the main storyline. It is a bit of an underwhelming conclusion, really. The Doctor and Vicki get caught in the "web", and Barbara nearly does before Ian's appearance distracts her and gives her enough time to point a thing at the Animus and kill it somehow. The Doctor is hailed as a hero, which is a bit harsh on Barbara, really. Without the Animus, the Larvae Guns are cute, cuddly creatures. Hmm, not sure I like that idea, if they're still potentially that deadly! In the previous story, we had a joke that referenced a joke from three weeks ago. Here we have a joke about the Doctor destroying Ian's tie from five weeks ago! That is showing faith in your audience, particularly with a story like this. It's a slightly underwhelming final episode, but still entertaining in and of itself. 5/10

Conclusion

I like the Web Planet. I know it isn't popular, but I think it does deserve a lot of praise simply for them having attempted it. Surely it's better to try something like this than just settle into the same old formula and do a Keys of Marinus clone? The sound design on this story is brilliant. I really like the Zarbi noise. Roslyn de Winter does excellently with the Menoptera, and she is particularly strong herself in her own performance. I think the Zarbi look very good, and while the Optera are slightly awkward, they do add something different.

There are stretches where people are talking about nothing in particular, but there's also always enough going on to keep up the interest. It's far from perfect, but I think it's more successful than not, and is a worthy part of season two's dazzling array of stories. This was Bill Strutton's only contribution to Doctor Who, and to him I say thank you.

Average Rating: 6.2

Old Rating: 6

New Rating: 6

The Romans

The Slave Traders

Though the DVD cover claims this was written by David Whitaker, this was actually Dennis Spooner's second story. And this is a vast improvement on the already high quality the Reign of Terror. This story sparkles right from the very start. Everyone is making jibes at Ian, from the Doctor saying, "there's a difference between resting and being bone idle" and playing the cruel, "don't let your mind wander" joke, to Vicki criticising Barbara for being "as bad as Ian". Then there's the best joke of the Doctor getting Ian's name wrong that we've had. The Doctor and Ian are having a mild argument, the Doctor calls him Chesterfield, and this time Barbara corrects the Doctor by saying "ChesterTON", to which the Doctor says "Barbara's calling you" and walks off.

It's stated that the TARDIS team have made money selling produce from their garden, which is a very nice, simple way to explain the money they have. The Doctor and Vicki make a superb team, so it's nice to see them going off to Rome together whilst Ian and Barbara make use of a finally free house to have sex, which it's quite blatant they have just done in the "fridge" scene. That whole section, and the comedy scene of Barbara knocking out Ian is great to watch.

The Doctor's having great fun finding a dead body and assuming the role of somebody who has an assassin after him. His line to the Centurion where he tells him to stop waving his sword about because he might kill somebody is great. Even better is when he says Vicki "keeps her eye on all the lyres", and Vicki's reaction to it.

I love this. The comedy is perfect and warm, and the story itself is intriguing and though not exactly fast-paced just yet, it's compelling. The four leads are perfect, and I can't think of a single thing to fault it. Wonderful. 10/10

 

All Roads lead to Rome

This episode begins with the best fight sequence we've seen so far in Doctor Who. I mean it. I tend to find fights very dull, and the only way to avoid that is to make them a comedy fight. It's very well done, too, especially the way Vicki chases him out. The Doctor talks about the gentle art of fisticuffs. Once again the Doctor is hilarious here, with Vicki as his foil. The scene with Tavius hissing at him, and then the scene with Nero is brilliant TV. The Doctor plays to Nero's ego hilariously, generally just takes the piss, and of course it features the "impossibissility" fluff. The person who introduces Nero clearly was excited to get a line as he goes massively over the top with it.

The farce that is mostly in episode three starts here, as the Doctor quickly rushes Vicki away from the slave auction just before Barbara appears. Then when Tavius is introducing Barbara to the palace, the Doctor and Vicki arrive and he asks the slave to bring them in, before quickly changing his mind and going out to meet them, so they narrowly avoid meeting her again. Both are played well, particularly the Doctor's eagerness to not let Vicki see the slave auction.

The storyline with Ian and Delos is a little bit harsher, as it doesn't really have the comedy elements in it, aside from Delos stating their luck has held so far right before they walk into a couple of soldiers, which is amusing. But their story is not so much fun.

The comedy in this story is wonderful. Doctor Who is always at its best when it is fun, and here it really is. It would be unbearably grim without that fun, too, with quite a lot of deaths, and desperate moments, such as Barbara sadly wondering if she'll ever see Ian again. I love this story. 9.5/10

 

Conspiracy

Kay Patrick appears here as Poppaea and gosh, she's lovely (Patrick, not Poppaea). In fact, I would have to say she is the most beautiful woman to appear in Doctor Who so far at this point, if you aren't counting regulars, in which case she'd be marginally second to Maureen O'Brien. Her performance is superb too, ignoring the comedy of this episode somewhat, and playing the dangerous, ambitious Empress very well. Her Poppaea fits in very well with this story's Nero. Long story short, I love her.

This episode is where the comedy really hits home, and yet there's still time for all sorts of quite nasty moments, such as Nero murdering Tigellinus and the cliffhanger, which is superb. There's also the moment when Vicki almost causes Nero's death, only prevented at the last second by the Doctor's hasty intervention! The Doctor's concert is brilliant fun, particularly the way Nero storms off when the Doctor gets all the applause. The way the Doctor calls Nero an "extra-ordinary fellow" is rather amusing, too.

I love this episode, too. I know some people don't like comedy in their Doctor Who, but I think it's essential, and there hasn't been a single era without it, anyway, it just varies in tone and subtlety. It's not particularly subtle here, but it is good, and very well played. Small bits like the Doctor calling Tavius, "our hissing friend", and the scene in the sauna with the Doctor repeatedly accidently pointing a sword right at Nero are just so much fun (which is a joke that will be repeated hilariously in the Gunfighters). As with episode one, this episode is entirely faultless. This is Dennis Spooner at his best. 10/10.

Inferno

The way Delos refuses to kill Ian is really sweet, and contrasts nicely to Nero murdering a soldier for "not fighting hard enough". Poppaea gives Tavius one heck of a smack. I like Tavius, and how it is revealed only at the end that he's a Christian. It's sweet how he helps Barbara escape and warns the Doctor. The Doctor making fun of Nero is a great scene, too.

It's interesting having Vicki telling the Doctor how he changed history. Must be quite a shock after the Aztecs and the Reign of Terror. The way he accepts it with that laughter, which merges with Nero's laughter, is almost quite creepy. But rather amusing, too.

I love how the second Ian and Barbara get back, Ian decides to get Barbara back for her fridge joke, and starts quoting Cicero again. Then they've had time to wash and have sex again before the Doctor and Vicki get back even though they left Rome at about the same time. Clearly the Doctor was slowing Vicki down considerably. Good on Dennis Spooner for making a joke that refers back to three weeks ago, though!

Essentially this episode revolves around the regulars giving Nero the idea to burn down Rome, and then running away. It is technically historically accurate, but it's not impossible, and the running away is one of the best things about the historicals. In "future" stories, the Doctor can magic a whole corrupt society better just like that. In the historicals he only makes an impression on a few people, people like Tavius, Anne Chaplet and James Stirling, rather than having an effect on the whole civilisation. I like that. 9.5/10

Conclusion

I've been quite brief about this story, but that's hardly surprising as there's nothing to lay in to. It's not far off perfect, and I experienced the whole thing with a big smile on my face. I wasn't expecting Marco Polo to be knocked off its perch until at least the Massacre, but this creams it, frankly. I love it, and it's easily my favourite story so far in this marathon. Everything I love about Doctor Who and historicals is contained here, and I adore the team of regulars. Vicki is so much fun, the Doctor is absolutely terrific here, and Ian and Barbara are as good as ever, and the people playing them are all on top form in this story. All the guest stars are terrific, the script is flawless. What more can be said?

Average Rating: 9.75

Old Rating: 9

New Rating: 10